Cline/Fay say there are areas in which parents just can't win. If a little one does not want to talk for relatives, eat vegetables or sit on their potty chair, all the threats and cajoling in the world won't get them to budge. We influence our children only by modeling. We model by how much we like our food at the table, eat our vegetables etc. The secret to establishing control is to concentrate on fighting battles that we know we can win. That means selecting the issues very carefully. We must pick areas where we do have control over our kids. Then we must offer choices in those areas. We may not be able to make a little one eat when they're at the table - that's an unwinnable battle - but we can control whether she's at the table or not. We may not be able to control when they do their chores but we can make sure they do them before they eat their next meal. 3 rules for control battles:
1) Avoid a control battle at all costs
2) If you're going to get into one, win at all costs
3) Pick the issue carefully. Whenever we lose a control battle, it's because we have not chosen the issue carefully.
No comments:
Post a Comment