Cline/Fay say "Children with a strong third leg on the three-legged table listen to a little voice in their head that says, 'I am capable of taking control of my life. I can make decisions, and I am strong enough to live with the good and the bad consequences of my decisions.' Children who say this have been allowed to make decisions about the things that affect them directly. Many parents tell their children they expect them to be responsible for themselves, yet these same parents are forever informing their kids when they are hot, cold, hungry, thirsty, tired, or even when they need to go to the bathroom. Examples:
Put on your coat. It's too cold to go out without one.
You can't be hungry. We just ate an hour ago.
Sit down and be quiet. You don't need another drink.
You get to sleep right this minute.
Be sure to use the bathroom before we leave.
Each of these messages tells children they are not capable of thinking for themselves, that they cannot take control of their life and make decisions." The result is kids who are not responsible, do not think for themselves, make poor choices and become dependent.
What are you doing, as parents, that contribute to this? What are some ways out?
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